The older I get, the more purpose I find in my life. I remember a few years back (after a quick stint living away), realizing that a big part of my purpose in life was to be a good daughter to my mom. Since then, I like to think I stepped up my game a bit. I had a talk with God and he assured me that my mom's grandkids would be extra cute and extremely huggable. Sure enough, he didn't disappoint.
Now I have a new role, another purpose. To raise two good and loving gentlemen. To teach my boys to know that they can become anything they want to be through hard work and perseverance. To not only give them morals and values, but to mold them to be polite, conscientious of others, confident and independent, selfless and kind. To remind them, if there's ever any doubt, that they're good, and that they make me proud. When they make mistakes I want them to learn from them, and to know that making mistakes makes you wiser so we shouldn't regret them. When they hurt someone, they should try to make it right. And when someone hurts them, they should forgive. I could go on, but I'd be here for months... From learning to tie a shoe to being a good husband and father, I have so much that I want to teach them. But it starts with me.
Being a parent means being the foundation for my children. I have to be their ever present, constant, strong, sustainable figure in their lives. I want them to always know that they can count on me, and that I'm always on their side, no matter what kind of mess they get into. I have to be their cheerleader, whether they win or lose, especially when they lose. And I don't want them to worry about me or my problems because I want them to focus on making their own lives happy and complete. And when things go wrong, and they need my help, I want to make sure they know I'm there for them, no questions asked. (Well, maybe a few questions.) I have to be selfless so that I can teach them to be selfless. I have to be reliable. That one is key. Reliability goes hand in hand with trust. I want to show them that they can trust that I will always follow through for them. After 33 years of having the best coach around, this is what I've learned.
This blog is slowly turning into a baby book for Jasper and Sam. And with that in mind, I want them to know that, and to never doubt that Jeremy and I will try every day to be that foundation, that rock for them. I'm not perfect. I still curse around them way too much. And I certainly lose my temper. But I say "I love you" as often as I possibly can. I kiss a lot of boo-boos and I work hard at providing them with a good balance of both fun and discipline every day. Being a parent is a privilege and a one-time opportunity to create someone better than yourself. I just hope I never, ever let them down.
